I’m going to share my top ten list of “accidents.” If you know me in real life, this list will likely not surprise you. I am just a wee bit accident prone (read: clumsy).
Keep in mind, these are just some of the most memorable. There are many, many more. If you’re pressed for time, at least read number 10. I saved the best (worst?) for last.
1. I’ve always been, shall we say, undertall. When I was about six years old, I had a tall dresser in my room. Once, after a bath, I climbed up the lower drawers to get to the top drawer sans clothing of any kind. The dresser tipped over and landed on top of me. When my Dad ran in to help me I yelled, “No, wait! Don’t come in. I’m naked!”
2. I went to a summer camp several years in a row in elementary school located in Jasper, Arkansas. (Now there’s a happening place.) One year, as I was leaning down to tie my shoe, someone opened a door into my head and left a gash in my scalp. I had to spend the afternoon in the nurses’ station getting it cleaned out. Oy.
3. Somewhere around 9th grade I answered a phone call upstairs in my parents house. It was for my Dad, who was downstairs, so I took off running down the carpeted stairs in my socks. I’m sure you see this coming, but I slipped somewhere near the top and toppled down the rest throwing the phone across the room. My Dad calmly picked up the phone and said, “Hey, I’ll have to call you back. My daughter just fell down the stairs. Again.”
4. On the day that I met my husband for the first time, ( I was 16!) I was with some friends on his parents’ houseboat. I went to pour myself a drink and ended up pouring the entire pitcher of grape Kool-Aid on the floor.
5. Whilst getting into a friend’s car, I held onto the door frame with my right hand and slammed it with my left, leaving four fingers on my right hand smash in the door. The door was actually latched and someone had to open it from the outside. That one really hurt!
6. I was grocery shopping once, and was reaching for a pack of soda on the top shelf. One popped out of the plastic and hit me square in the forehead. And then it burst on the floor. Thankfully there were only about 5 other shoppers to witness this.
7. I was carrying a laundry basket in front of my face as I walked down the hall in our house in California. ( I know, bad idea.) I ran the basket into the wall and the edge of the basket into the bridge of my nose. It blacked both of my eyes and possibly broke my nose.
8. The fall of my sophomore year of collge, I contracted some sort of stomach flu. During one of my morning classes, I had to run frantically from the room in search of a bathroom. I found the women’s rest room and made it through the first set of doors, and then vomitted chocolate milk all over the second set of doors.
9. Also in college, during pledge week, I tripped and fell standing in line at the post office while wearing a skirt, heels, and hose. I, of course, then had a huge run in my hose, and spilled the entire contents of my backpack on the floor.
Ok, I saved the best for last. I still cringe a little over this one.
10. My very first week as a freshman at OBU, I really pulled a good one. While walking through the cafeteria (which was FULL of people by the way) carrying a full tray of food and a drink, I tripped. Over nothing at all. I fell ONTO the tray I was carrying, breaking the plate and sending food splattering everywhere. And the best part? As I got up and dusted myself off, the cafeteria full of upperclassmen gave me a STANDING OVATION.
If you can top that one, I’d like to hear it.
Really.
It might make me feel better. 
This is linked to 10 on the 10th and 
{ 30 comments… read them below or add one }
oh, emily!!! we are so alike it's scary. here's my most embarrassing moment…
i was a cheerleader in college and our first game of the season was homecoming…everyone and their mother was in the gym. we had practiced our routine and it was down, but we didn't practice running onto the court beforehand…the pack of jumping screaming cheerleaders and me all moved toward the center of the court…i got tripped and fell FLAT on my face. can you imagine the sound on the wooden floor!!!!! to make matters worse…the guy i was dating had brought his parents to the game and i was supposed to meet them (for the first time) after. just as i fell, his mom leaned over to ask 'which one is she?' …yeah, mom…she's the one on the floor!!! so embarrassing!!!!!
so just know you aren't alone in these…i am totally accident prone…and undertall. just ask my best friend. he makes fun of me all the time.
haha!! right! my middle name starts with a g…but it definitely doesn't stand for grace.
Hey fellow OBU'er! I never dropped my tray in Walts, but I did fall down the front steps after leaving supper one night (well, it really was 5:00 – why did we eat so early?) and I got the same ovation.
My cheeks still flame with embarrassment.
Oh Emily. I'm sorry that I laughed at loud at almost every single one of your ten things. #10 was especially funny (and also NOT).
One time at a Sunday School party I ran inside to get my purse and ran SMACK into the glass door. Knocked me on my butt and my nose was pouring blood. I don't remember this part, but my friends SWEAR that I was crying and asking, "Am I going to be ugly now?" Oh my gosh…
I ended up with two black eyes when the swelling went down. Lovely.
Unfortunately I can totally relate. At least we can look back on them and laugh, right?
those are so funny. PAtrick needs to get you a full suit of football pads so you can wear them at all times. At least you can relate to Miles when he starts trying to walk:)
All I can say is Oh my gosh! Those are too FUNNY and all make me feel a little better, hee hee. I have similar stories. I should try to think of a list like you did. I do wish I had been in the Cafeteria the day that happened at OBU. I'm sure I wasn't or I would for sure remember that. Also, the pledge week incident, too bad I didn't get to see that one either.
How did you end up pouring the whole pitcher of kool-aid on the floor? Patrick must have really been a distraction:)
Thanks for sharing. Pretty great stuff.
Sara–
Um. Which Sara am I speaking to? haha! I can't contact you through your link.
I spilled the whole pitcher b/c it had ice in it and the lid wasn't open like I thought it was. So the ice hit the lid and the whole thing went everywhere. Nice first impression, huh?
Oh Emily. You have NO IDEA how badly I needed some giggles today. THANK YOU. These are hysterical.
hey em…
i'm not sure if this tops yours, but i would argue that it deserves some sort of award…
i went to upstate NY (where people are so friendly??) to visit my boyfriend at the time and his family. we were going out to some fancy/overpriced restaurant and i needed to buy a dress. so i found a maurices (that's right, they have that in NY) and after i found what i wanted i walked straight to the cash register (and i guess i wasn't paying any attention) and knocked over a line of 7 manikins, decapitating most of them, exposing their naked manikin bodies after i tore a bikini off one of the females…i was trying to catch them all and i just made it worse. i was holding on to one of their arms after it all finally stopped.
my boyfriend at the time was laughing hysterically and so was i…the workers, however, were not amused.
i'm not sure i've laughed that much since then…
xoxo,
tb
I love that you used the word "whilst"! It's terribly underused.
By the way, was that my car? Because that definitely happened to someone who was with me once, and I can't remember who it is.
Surely you haven't done that twice…
Maybe it was my sister. And maybe I slammed her fingers into the door. I wouldn't put it past me; I did kick out her front tooth once.
And Leah wins the award for Best Big Sister Ever.
ok i am laughing so hard right now! i am getting some strange looks from jeremy but oh my goodness you crack me up!
My parents used to call me Grace all the time for the exact same reasons. I COULD tell you a few of my accident stories to make you feel better, but it was SO much more fun to laugh at yours!
Hi! I found your blog from the list on the 10 on the 10th.
Hilarious list…mainly because I'm so glad that I'm not the only one who has a long list of "oops" moments. The last one I didn't do while in college (I went to OBU also by the way), but I did in middle school and it was horrifying.
Hey, Emily! I'm here via Mer, and I am so glad I found you! That was hysterical!!! Only because I can relate to almost every one of those accidents!!! I may or may not be a tad bit clumsy myself.
I'm an OBUer, too, and still hanging out in Tiger Town.
So glad to meetcha!
wow you really are accident prone! those were hilarious though. i'm sure they weren't when they happened though.
If my poor 17 mo old daughter continues on the path she is now… I now know what her future looks like. You've had some luck!
Bless…your…heart. You win the prize, hands down.
I'm sorry
.
(Laugh out loud!!!)
I'm clumsy, but I can't top those. #3 is the funniest. I'm glad you have a sense or humor about your tumbles!
What a cute blog! Sorry, I can't top that embarassing moment, but I'll share one. I worked in a shoe shop during college. I was bending down to help someone put on shoes and when I stood up, my slip (which was old and probably had no elastic left) remained on the floor around my ankles.
What can you do but laugh. Enjoyed visiting you via Pensieve's Favorite Posts. Blessings!
These are so funny! All i can say is I truly have the most embarassing moments. A couple of more and i could write a book; that's no joke. However, I would have to share them privately–not on this public forum! Please visit me sometime at http://www.lollipopandpearls.blogspot.com
Be blessed,
Lolli (aka Lisa)
Oh I'm so sorry. I know we just "met" and all, but #3,6,&7 made me laugh out loud. We'll probably never be friends now, right?
But I'm quite sure you would make a very entertaining friend!
OH, the standing ovation did make me cringe a little! *sigh*
Thanks for linking up this week!
emily, i’m glad to hear there are other clumsy, accident-prone folks:) in the past day, i’ve knocked a travel mug onto the floor (and onto my husband’s man purse-oops!), and i dropped two loads of laundry down an entire flight of stairs. gah.
my worst experience was the time in 7th grade that i fell off my bike and down a bank, getting stuck under my bike in a mess of thorn bushes and poison ivy. AND THE FIRE AND RESCUE had to get me out (but not until i had to summon a stranger crying out “help me! help me!”)
i have another horrific story of a medical sort of nature, but there is no way i will ever record it online for posterity. my college roommates experiencing it with me was more than enough mortification;)
Okay, this post cracked me up! I’m not quite so…clumsy, but I definitely have my moments. Last night I poured myself a tall glass of lemonade, went to set it on the table…and poured it on the floor instead. I have NO IDEA h
…how that happened, but it definitely did.
This list just made me SO HAPPY because I’m ridiculously accident prone. I love when I find my kind.
How did you hide this from me so far???
No major catastrophes at Relevant OR Blissdom. It’s some sort of record for me.
I love the word of the year necklace!